Statistically Speaking
Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.
Evan Esar (1899 - 1995), Esar’s Comic Dictionary
Have you seen the report from American Adotions? You know, that non-profit agency who thinks that lives can be bettered thru adoption? Well now they have the statistics to prove it. For example, if you are a mother thinking of giving your child up for adoption, remeber these two key points:
- You are more likely to have higher educational aspirations, are more likely to finish school, and less likely to live in poverty than mothers who keep their children.
- You are more likely to delay marriage longer, are more likely to marry eventually, and are less likely to divorce.
- You are more likely to be employed 12 months after the birth and less likely to repeat out-of-wedlock pregnancy.
- You are more more likely to suffer negative psychological consequences, such as depression, than mothers who rear children as single parents.
But wait, that’s not all… After all, adption is all about the children right and…
- Teens who were adopted at birth are more likely than children born into intact families to live with two parents in a middle-class family.
- Adopted children score higher than their middle-class counterparts on indicators of school performance, social competency, optimism and volunteerism.
- Adopted adolescents generally are less depressed than children of single parents and less involved in alcohol abuse, vandalism, group fighting, police trouble, weapon use and theft.
- Adopted adolescents score higher than children of single parents on self-esteem, confidence in their own judgment, self-directedness, positive view of others and feelings of security within their families.
- On health measure, adopted children and children of intact families share similarly high scores, and both these groups score significantly higher than children raised by single parents.
Reading this, I guess we should all trade our kids out once born.
Then again, they are proud supporters of the National Council of Adoption who have this on their website:
Research in NCFA’s Adoption Factbook IV reports another decline in the annual number of infant adoptions in America. In the interests of children and their biological parents who may not be ready to parent, the adoption community must do a better job of enabling women with unplanned pregnancies to consider adoption. NCFA is expanding its efforts to revive the institution of infant adoption through sound pregnancy counseling and a public communications campaign that will promote infant adoption awareness and understanding. Our goal is not to pressure people into choosing adoption; rather, it is to enable parents with unplanned pregnancies, who may not be able or ready to parent, to consider adoption without fear, misunderstanding, or bias.You can read the whole letter here.
Without bias. Hmmm, yet you start the whole thought about how there is a decline in infant adoptions and you must do a better job of enabling women to give up their kids. Not praising the fact that these women may be standing on their own two feet and decide to keep their child, or that their family is helping out, or that the father may have stepped up. Nope, we need to enable them. Seems to be they were enabled and you feel like they stole your lunch money. Personally, I applaud that in the very early 70’s, according to their statistics, roughly 19% of babies born to white, un-married women were given up and only about 1.7% in the 90’s. (Oh and here’s a tidbit for you, according to their own stats, before ‘73 the rate was about 19% but it dropped to 7.5 between ‘73 and ‘81. You can review the PDF here if you want.
Am I biased? Yep! Are they biased? YEP!! So go read the stuff and make your own decision.
September 27th, 2007 at 4:59 pm
I don’t know where they got their stats from!
Robin Winkler found that 90 percent of (bio) mothers suffered depression for the rest of their lives.
I dropped out of uni because they would not let me keep my son and study at the same time. I never went back - how could I go back to such a barbaric place!
I still lost my son tho.
Ironically, he dropped out of uni because he was depressed about losing me.
Since our reunion, he has registered to go back - he is much happier now as I am.
BTW here is one piece of information they don’t want you to have -
adoptees as a group are over-represented in serial killers!!!
Hmmm - I wonder why they left that one out now!!!
October 14th, 2007 at 10:44 am
Very interesting statistics. As an adoptee I’d have to say that my birth mother probably did the right thing without any encouragement. 52 years ago the social consequences of a bastard child were pretty severe.
The down side of it all is that my birth mother looked for and found me 20 years ago and then this year decided she wasn’t my mother anymore - just someone that gave birth to me. I’m inapproprate because she didn’t raise me and the embarassment is just too much for her and her social status. Through her I located by birth father and while I never met him I did talk with him a couple of times. He never wanted to establish a relationship so I respected that. He died on 9/30.
So, while adoption may or may not be the answer, once it’s done it should be done. Birth parents should never have the right to inflict themselves on the chidren they threw away and while they may be depressed, it’s their own damn fault for being so careless in the first place. I may be 51 but let me tell you, what my “mother” did to me was inexcusable, cruel, and devastating.
October 17th, 2007 at 9:37 am
First of all, it is very sad how your (bio) mother treated you.
It is inexcusable.
Secondly, please do NOT label me as being the same as her!
I did NOT “throw” away my son!
I wanted my son more than anything in the world - as did his father.
We were NOT careless - we were ROBBED!
I don’t know about the rest of the world, but in Ontario, adoption fraud was rife.
The Ontario government has acknowledged this to be the case - as has the UN.
We are GOOD parents. We WANTED our son. We were ENGAGED - but apparently that was NOT good enough! They STOLE him from us when CATHOLIC nurse realised I had not had the chance to marry my son’s father and called the CATHOLIC social services to take him right out of the maternity ward. They used the excuse that my ex was a danger to my son - my ex was NOT my son’s father and I was NOT with him - I was with my son’s father. The police REFUSED to lock up my abusive ex. - while the social services punished US for someone else’s crimes.
The agency that STOLE our son from us now admits that it took bribes and paid professioals to LIE. I have documents that show these LIES that I was able to disprove. My evidence was so strong that the UN has officially entered me into their Registry for Adoption Fraud Victims (not to mention those of violence and torture at the hands of professionals).
I fought tooth and nail to get my son back - I did NOTHING wrong!
Do NOT lump me in with those that hurt you - I am NOT and NEVER was that way.
BTW, my son’s adoptive father does not deny paying bribes.
I found my son and he is reunited with us and his siblings. We are both proud to call him son.
My son was also not given some very VITAL medical information which almost KILLED him.
He has thanked us profusely for finding him and making sure that he has this.
My son’s father even took him out to a music festival recently - my son does NOT consider us to have “inflicted” ourselves on him. He is delighted that we found him!
I am sorry that your reunion did not end well - BUT…
we are NOT all the same, thank you very much!
Please do NOT lump me in with others that have hurt you - that is NOT fair.
October 19th, 2007 at 7:02 pm
I threw up a little when I read that SHIT from the NCFA.
October 21st, 2007 at 5:08 am
I think 93% of all adoptees would find these statistics to be nothing more than drivel.
Statistically speaking.
February 21st, 2008 at 12:40 pm
Wow is all I can say. I am 49 years old and I can honestly say that everyday of my life I have felt appreciation for my birthparents decision. Not only for giving me life, but also for giving me “a life”. I have never felt that I was “given away”, or rejected. Instead I feel that I was loved enough to have an adoption plan made for me. I can only imagine what a difficult decision it was to make, and I hope they have never regretted it. My REAL (adoptive) parents have always loved me unconditionally. While I may have biological roots elsewhere my ROOTS are firmly planted with my parents, siblings and relatives that I grew up with and have a relationship with. It might be nice to look at someone whom I can see myself in, but it really isn’t that important. I look at my parents, etc…and see MY FAMILY! And don’t think my life has been perfect either - it hasn’t, but that’s life. There may be things I would change, but being adopted isn’t one of them.