Soul of Adoption
Never does the human soul appear so strong and noble as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.
Edward Chapin
Adoption is not a pretty present with a cute bow. It isn’t a bowl of mud with worms in it. It isn’t a bowl full of cherries nor is it a bowl of rotten fruit.
It’s all of them and none of them.
And that is what we have here in blogland. A multitude of voices crying out to be heard.
Adoptees who believe their adotion was perfect and the best thing for them. Adoptees who have good relationships with their parents but still want to know and adoptees who had terrible adoptive parents and are full of righteous pain. We also have adoptees that fit every space in between.
Birthparents/firstparents/natural parents who feel they were cheated, abused, lied to and many with cause. We have some who willingly gave up their children but may have regretted it later or may still feel that it was the best thing. We also have everyone that fits every space in between.
Adoptive Parents who want to understand all the possibilities of what it means to be adopted, others who just want to hear how perfect it is, and still others who speak like it’s all about them. We also have everyone that fits every space in between.
In other words, we have the soul of adoption.
That’s just it. We fight and argue, we cry and comfort, we love and hate, we scream and whimper, we hope and dream. Some of us have hearts of strength, other have hearts in shards. Some of us are filled with pain, some of us with light.
Tomorrow we may switch places.
As humans, we make mistakes. We say things before we think and they come across wrong. We hurt others intentionally and unintentionally. We are hurt by others intentionally and unintentionally and lash out in return or run away. When we do this, we stop listening and stop trying to understand. We sometimes take things literally rather than understanding the feelings behind. Like the difference between the letter and spirit of the law.
Despite this the soul goes on.
Meanwhile some get hurt. Some very important voices are made to feel unimportant or invalid. Don’t stop talking though. Sometimes, the smallest instrument holds the most important melody in a symphony. The rest is just accompaniment. We just need to stop and listen to the music of another’s soul
June 17th, 2007 at 6:19 am
agree with you, as always.
June 17th, 2007 at 6:10 pm
Great post Wraith.
Poss. xx
June 18th, 2007 at 6:13 pm
Beautifully and tastefully said Wraith!
June 26th, 2007 at 11:30 am
Well said, Wraith. Thank you. Hugs, Rebecca
June 27th, 2007 at 6:44 am
Hey there. I wanted to give you the heads up that I linked to this post. Hope you don’t mind the extra traffic. :) You rock. Hugs, Rebecca
July 2nd, 2007 at 1:01 am
Some of us have the decision made by a selfish mother. A lot of fathers want to be fathers, but the mothers make it so hard and put up so many walls, it is impossible to be an effective and engaged father.
April 11th, 2008 at 1:52 am
Birthparents move to let their children be adopted is a smart one granted they know that they cannot sustain the bright future of their children. But the sad fact is, in time, birthparents cannot really contain the longing to see or feel their children. To let your children adopted is really a crucial decision to make.
-Jan