The Letter: Part Two
Okay, so besides not having my name right, the other thing as I mentioned last post was that it starts off with “We are delighted that we could assist you with search and reunion services. Our best wishes to you for a continuing, positive relationship.” As I said, I am not sure what relationship they are talking about because it obciously wasn’t with my mom or with them. Anyway, I wrote back:
On Friday I recieved a letter from (The Agency) with a request for a letter of recommendation or a donation. However, I don’t know if you are fully aware of the way this letter comes across.
For example, the first name on the envelope and letter isn’t mine. The letter was addressed to David Sandifer, not Daniel, at my address and while I can understand this may have been a typo, for someone who is trying to find a part of their identity, it isn’t a small thing.
The second issue was the first two lines. “We are delighted that we could assist you with search and reunion services. Our best wishes to you for a continuing, positive relationship.” Exactly what “continuing, positive relationship” are we talking about? Again, as an adoptee, this struck me as a bit harsh as I don’t have a continuing or positive relationship with my birthmother nor am I likely too and with the holiday season coming up, this was a bit painful to read.
I realise these are probably just form letters, but it seems a bit more care should have been taken to how they would be percieved. Please remove me from these requests as I don’t want to recieve them anymore.
Respone one within 2 minutes:
HUGE MISTAKE!! VERY SORRY!!
Response two within 10 minutes:
M asked me to respond to your message. I am very sorry you received this letter in error. It was unintentional and was not meant to cause you any pain. We understand that this is very difficult in light of your not having contact with your birth mother. I sincerely hope this will not cause bad feelings on your part with (The Agency.) We hope that in time your deep wound will heal.
I feel so much better, in a NOT sort of way. You were right kim.kim, I should have asked for money.
December 15th, 2006 at 3:30 am
Good lord! The response is almost worse than the letter.
Unintentional? Sloppy and incompetent is more like it.
And these folks are doing search and reunions?
I would ask for a refund!
December 18th, 2006 at 5:53 pm
And flowers and chocolates. At least they apologized which is decent, but still, urk.
Well now you have a name which is very exciting, you can hunt her down and stand right in front of her and tell her she has a grandson.
January 21st, 2007 at 7:24 pm
“We hope that in time your deep wound will heal.”
Wow. That sounds so drippingly sincere…..NOT.
Actually it sounds as if they think you’ve read “Primal Wound” which they not only think is a joke but also the bane of their existence because they blame it for making adoptees angry. Those dang angry adoptees never donate.