At church the other day, the pastor spoke about a journal he kept for his son. He would write about the things he saw or thoughts he had as his son grew up.

I thought this idea was great, so I have begun to occasionally write in the journal as well as draw pictures for him. I’m not much of an artist but I have a few beginner books with small drawings so I make them for him and to relax. I hope one day he will read it and see I’m not such the ogre that he thinks I probably am now. All these rules and expectations, poor guy. :lol:

When I was growing up my mom had this drawing books that took basic letters and redrew them into animals. My favorite, and the only one I can remember, is the cursive letter G which made a cool looking bug with a can of People Spray. I made this for my son and he can’t stop laughing at the people spray so it’s the first drawing in the journal.

It’s kind of funny though. He probably won’t see this for years but I still can’t put down anything about my birth mother. It’s like I want to protect him (me?) from trying to understand it. Or maybe I am still hoping it will change and I will never have to tell him. :wacko: Get’s confusing now.

For now though, I need to stop, searching that is. I don’t have the strength to keep trying so hard so I need a breather. The agency can kiss my butt because they aren’t getting a dime more from me. I need to get back to reading and writing as well as get back to working on the Chosen Babies group and developing it more. Basically, I need to work on me to get thru this anger and pain. Sort of “deal with the inner rapids of my mind.”

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